Love so hard....

It's hard to be love and yet it's easy to be loved.
When will we meet our fated half?
What will our fate be? Star-crossed? Forever? or both?

Love and Fate are always together.
One can't be without there other.
Yet, they can be far away from each other.

Oh, how cruel is fate.....
Oh, how cruel is love.....

Do Not Want

I have been doing things that I do not want to do, and have been hoping that people stop telling me what to do and let me do what I want to do.

I want to do a lot of things, yet I can't.
There are always people telling me what to do.
I will always follow.
I could have been miserable about being told what to do, however, I don't feel that way. In fact, I just follow what people want me to do.

It's complicated, but it's my life. I don't want it to change at all.

Devil Heart

Have I become a Devil?
My mind has been in turmoil. It's like as if part of me is trying to get out.
Lots of bad thoughts kept on appearing in my mind!
Am I going mad?
Am I becoming a Devil?

How do you know what a Devil does?
How do you control a Devil coming out of you?

Will the Devil inside me consume me?
Will the Devil inside me control me?

How can I avoid becoming the Devil?
How can I avoid having a Devil Heart?

Risking life for pleasure!

I was tempted. I was going to risk it all. I wanted to risk it. However, somehow, someone or something stepped in. I will never try, tempt or want to risk my life ever again.

Forgetting is the hardest thing to do.

Somehow, I can't never forget the things that I did wrong and wrong things that happened to me. I can't never forget. This is also part of my Suffering. I can't never forget that bad things. It's also one of the things that is making me lose my mind. Apart from the Voices in my Head and the Suffering that I endure, remembering bad things is another Pain that I am Suffering.

What Everyone Expect Me To Do?

When I follow rules or follow instructions, people will tell/asked me :
"Chill out."
"Why must you follow the rules?"
"Why are you following the rules? Can't you follow yourself?"
"Loosen up."
etc.

When I don't follow the rules/instructions 100% or I follow my instinct, people will tell/asked me:
"You must follow the rules!"
"You must be strict!"
"Instructions are there to be followed!"
etc.

What can I do? What Should I do? I am standing in the middle of "Follow rules/instruction" and "Follow instinct". No one will listen to what I want to say. No one will even care if I follow instructions or not. They sure hell don't even care if I have feelings either.

Fragile Heart

My Love Life is a huge mess. Don't know when will I be able to clean it up. I almost always got the wrong ideas about Loving someone. That's why my Love Life is now in a huge mess. Another reason I thought would be that I have a Fragile Heart. I am afraid of being rejected. I am afraid of being turned down. I am afraid. That's why I am in a mess. Suffering from mental anguish and hearing Voices in my head not to mention feeling very very Lonely. Something inside me is holding me back. It's like my unconcious self is telling me that my Heart can't take it. It's like my Heart can shattered easily. I am a mess.

Lonely Heart (II)

Being Lonely is turning out to be a Torture. Couple that with some Jealousy and some unfair feelings inside of me. I get a very very Lonely Heart. Most of my friend are either in a Relatioship or have already tied the knot. Looking at them being Happy and taking things for granted. I felt this world really is Unfair. However, I believe I myself is to blame. I haven't been giving much effort to all this. I am just not doing enough. I just not doing hard enough. Maybe I was clinging too much to Fate. I think I am delusional about the meaning of Fate. I mean, I believe so much in Fate, that I just accept everything that happens as it is. Hence, my Lonely Heart.

Where Is The Love?

How does one Love someone? Yes, I understand that Love can't be teach. But sometimes, I just don't know what really is Love? What is Love actually? And Where do you find Love?
In a previous post, I asked, can Love really conquer all? If this world is a movie, then I believe Love really can conquer all, however, I don't believe the world is a stage. This is very contradicting. I believe everything happens because of Fate, but I won't believe that the world is a stage. Probably is just me in denial because I cannot find Love. Probably is because I feel it is difficult to find True Love in this world. But even so, is there really True Love? I am Jealous. Honestly, my failure to find True Love has make me Jealous about other people. However, as usual, I kept the feeling inside me. It is also part of my Suffering.
So, Where is the Love? Someone tell me?

My Life

My Life so far has seen more Downs than there is Ups. Doesn't seem fair. But I do understand that Life isn't even a bit fair at all. However, maybe because it has been so long that I live my Life that way is was Fated to be that I just live with it. Somehow that's not the way I should live my Life. I should probably get and do something. Defy Fate?

Hatred

I Hate a lot of things. I Hate people not talking about the truth. I Hate people giving lots of excuses. And I Hate people talking, talking and talking and yet no action. I am a very straight forward guy. I talk straight to the point. I Hate people that like to talk crap. I Hate it when people Ignore me. I Hate people that ask obvious questions. I Hate people that doesn't listen to both side of a story and make conclusion without considering what really is gong on. I Hate people that only stick to what they know and won't learn new things. I Hate people that take their life for granted. Most of all. I Hate myself.

Pain

Stick and Stones will cause Pain. However, from my experience, there is another kind of Pain that is more Painful. Emotional Pain is more Painful than being cut by a knife or hit by a stick/stone.
Being someone that is often being ignore by other people, I felt the Pain of not being someone that is being ignore. I am someone that needs a bit of attention. I don't know why, but I like it when someone take notice. However, no one notice and it is Painfully hard to understand why? I tried to get people's attention by trying very hard to do things that could get people's attention, but all are in Vain. It's like everyone is Ignoring me on purpose and nothing I do will make them notice me. I am not an attention whore, but I sometimes it feels good to be notice! However, it never really happens. People keep on Ignoring me. I just don't know why.
The feeling of being Ignored to me is more Painful than me getting hit by a basketball at point blank range. More Painful than getting Cut by a knife. And more Painful than hitting a stationary lorry while riding a bicycle.
That's the Pain that I felt. The Pain that I have been Suffering for so long.

Overcome The Suffering

Over the years of Suffering and Sorrow, I tried to overcome it with little Success. However, I am no longer the same person I was 10 years ago. I am more calm and I smile alot. I also cry less than I used to. I like to Cry. Crying makes the Suffering go away for a while, then it came back. Now, I found out that Smilling also make the Suffering go away, but a bit longer than Crying. I do Cry once in a while, when I am Sad or when I am really really down and felt the Pain Unbearable. Some people might say Crying are for the weak. I don't believe that's True. Even the Strong Cry sometimes. Not that I am saying that I am Strong. Because I am not Strong. But I am neither weak. I am just someone that is Suffering from the inside.
Smilling does overcome the Suffering but there are times when Smilling can't overcome the Pain and Sorrow that I felt. It's like a Void that I have never been able to overcome, even until now.

My Soul

I have always asked myself and wonder if I have a Soul or I don't have a Soul. The reason is that sometimes I felt that I want to kill everyone and yet there was something that is telling me "No.No.No.No." over and over and over. This is unlike the Voices In My Head. This one is a feeling. A feeling of wanting to do something bad to other people,but at the same time there is another feeling of trying not to do something bad to other people. It's like I have two side of me. One is without a Soul and one is with a Soul. However, the feeling of being half of each isn't there. It's actually like one feeling with the tendency be Souless and with a Soul. There probably also a thin line between turning Souless and without a Soul. However, I do not think that line exist as I am always thinking of trying to do bad things it is just that some force or something is pulling me back from going totally Souless.

Fate

I believe that we live in this world, everything that happens is because of Fate. The meaning of Fate varies from person to person, culture to culture and author to author.
I just believe that Fate is what happens around me. It is Fate that I have a bunch of friends that I met near the end of my schooling years and it is also Fate that something happens and they are all no longer my friends anymore. I kept on wondering, why did it all end like that? Was our friendship doomed to fail from the beginning? Or was it Fate that I became friends only to end the friendship later? I lost lots of friends due to misunderstandings and events. Probably if we even met on the streets, we would be like strangers walking past each other. I kept on asking myself "What I did wrong?". I asked the same question over and over and there was no answer other than Fate. In chinese, we call it "命運"(min yun). It was Fate that brought us together, it was Fate that brought us apart.

Between Sanity and Insanity

I have been in between Sanity and Insanity for a few times because of the Voices in my head. It's the Voices of Screaming that is Unbearable. Couple with my Sadness towards this World and also my Sorrow and my Suffering inside of me. That thin line that separate Sanity and Insanity. I am standing on it.
One day I might wake up not knowing that I have already gone Insane. Lost forever in my screwed up mind of mine.
I believe that one day I might not be able to control myself and go crazy from all the Voices of Screaming, Pain, Suffering and Sorrow in my head.
I also found myself sometimes that I just want to end it all there and then. It's too Unbearable to take it anymore. However, my mind somehow retained some bits of Sanity so that I don't do anything Insane.
As I have mentioned, it's the Voices in my Head. It won't go away. And I don't see it going away. I always tell myself that one day, I will really be screwed.

Crying Out In This Sad World (II)

My Lonely Heart is Crying Out Aloud In This Sad World. Along with the Voices In My Head, Crying probably is the only thing that I can do. Must have been Fate to be born into this Sad World. Or is it Destiny?
Looking at how Sad this World is, with all the Wars and the Killings. It is just as Depressing as the Voices in My Head.
Sometimes it makes you feel that it would be better to leave this Sad World. Sometimes. battling with oneself and also battling with what is really happening in this World, letting go sometimes might be the best way. Is it?

Voices In My Head

I have been having Voices In My Head for a very very long time now. As I have said, it is not those so-called "Voices" that tells you to go do things. The Voices I heard are people Screaming, people in Pain, people Crying, people in Sorrow and people Suffering.
It's Unbearable. Everytime there is an episode, I would be unable to do anything but try to make it go away. However, it doesn't go away until after a few hours. The Voices of people Screaming is the loudest. It's like being Shouted at from all angles. Then there is also the Voices of Pain, Crying, Sorrow and Suffering. Those are more Unbearable.
It's very hard having to Endure the Voices in my head. It is as if I am going to go Crazy anytime. I tried to Ignore it, but the Screaming is just too loud. The Voices in my head makes me felt like that there is World War III going on in my head and I am in the middle of the battlefield trying to make both side stop fighting. It's hopeless. That's what I thought. However, over time, I have just grown to make it part of my Life. It is more Bearable that way, but for how long?

Lonely Heart

I have been Lonely to. Part of my Suffering that is.
After looking at other people having girlfriends and wifes. I felt Lonely.
Jealousy might have a huge part in what I am feeling. In fact, part of my Suffering is because there is no one to share my inner feelings to. No one to listen to my Sorrows, no one to listen to my Suffering. No one to listen to my problems.
Add all that, my heart felt Lonely.
Maybe I haven't try hard enough to find someone that understands me. Or maybe there is no one like that in this world. Who knows?
Being Lonely is just as Painful to bear. It's like the Voices in my head that I heard. All the Voices of Suffering, Voices of Pain, Voices of Sorrow felt Lonely.
It is Depressing. Feeling Lonely is very Depressing. It is also Sad.

To Be Love

What it is liked to be Love? I wonder.
I have always dislike Valentine's Day. Maybe because I am Jealous. No, I am Jealous.
Maybe that is just me.
What is it liked to Love someone?
I loved someone once. But it was long time ago. When my mind is still young. I have learned that that is not True Love.
What is True Love?
How do we know when there is Love?
What is Love?

Crying Out In This Sad World.

I watched the Jdrama series named "Crying Out aloud in the center of the world". It tells the story about a guy who "Ran Away" after his high school sweetheart dies of leukemia. For 17 years, he was Suffering. Somehow I could understand his pain.
Yeah, maybe you might say it is "just a fantasy drama series". Maybe.
However, Suffering for 17 years. Been there, done that and probably still Suffering. In fact, I think I Suffer more than 17 years.
My life isn't a Jdrama or a TV drama or a stage drama. It's real. The Pain is real. The Suffering is real and the Voices in my head is real.
Deep inside me, I might not be Crying out aloud in the center of the world, but I am Crying Out In This Sad World.
Maybe there is Fun out there. Maybe there is Happy out there. Maybe. I will still say it is a Sad Sad World out there. People are killing each other, people are trying to beat each other, people are trying to bully each other.
Seeing how Depressing it is out there, my own personal problems might be trivial, but I felt for this World and the peopel living in it. It is truly a Sad World we are living in.

The Dark Side Within Me

I was an Angry person long time ago. Now I am no longer that person. However, because of what happened in the past, I feel that as if there is something inside me that is trying to come out to prove a point.
We know that Anakin Skywalker has Anger in him. In the end, he got mislead by the Dark Side and turned into Darth Vader.
Not that I am saying I am going to be Darth Vader or anything, it is just that sometimes I felt like beating up someone or if I am shopping at a supermarket, I felt compel to steal something, anything!!
I am always on the guard somehow. Observing people and hoping that they will attack me or someone will suddenly go berzerk and start attacking people so that I can join in the fun.
Ok, you might think I am sick saying that a fight is fun. Well, yeah you can say I am sick. The truth is, I think I am Sick. Mentally.
I also tell myself that I needed professional help, but I just can't get myself to tell anyone about myself and my problems.
I believe I do have a Dark Side, and I am trying very hard to suppress it. However, I felt that if something or someone do or say something to trigger it, then all is Lost. I believe there will be the day when that happens. However, I am trying very hard not to make that day come.
I am no Darth Vader, but if the Voices of Suffering/Screaming/Pain in my head are a warning sign, I am in trouble.

To Get Help or Not To Get Help

I might not understand what multidimid has been trying to tell me or comment about my posts so far, but one things for sure, he/she sure has lots of interesting stuff to say.
Ok, back to what I want to say. I was an angry person. I tend to lose temper very easily. But over the past several years, I managed to stay calm. I might lose my temper every now and then, but I am more calm than what I was during my schooling years. As I have said in my previous posts, I was Lost back then. I still felt I am Lost now, but in a more calm kind of way. I have lots of things that I have been keeping inside me. My Suffering, my Sadness, my Sorrow, my Regrets, my Past Behaviour. Everything is being kept inside. I wanted to tell people, but they won't listen to me nor they even care. So, I felt I am like a Time Bomb. It is slowly making me felt that one day, I might just burst out and lose my mind. I have been preparing for that possibility!
What is bothering me is Should I get Help or Should I get No Help?
I have been enduring this silent Suffering for almost 15 years already. I have make it part of my life. However, recently I have been hearing voices in my heard. No, not those voices that tell me to go do bad things or do something. I have been hearing voices of people screaming. Voices of people Suffering in Pain. Voices of Angry People. Everytime I heard the Voices, I would felt that I am one of those Voices. Screaming, Suffering in Pain, Shouting in Anger.
To Get Help or Not To Get Help?

The Ghost Of My Past, Present and Future

Uncle Scrooge might have been visited by the Ghost of Christmas Past, Present and Future. I have my own Ghost that Haunts me too.

The Ghost of My Past is Anger.
I was an Angry Person back during my schooling years. I used to get Angry when things doesn't go my way. There was once I shouted "GO TO HELL" at the top of my voice in front of my class and my voice was heard by 3 other classes. For no reason. I was Lost back then. There was so much Anger in me, that I don't even know who I was back then. That is the Ghost of My Past.

The Ghost of My Present is Suffering.
Because of my Anger, I now Suffer from what I have done in the Past. I got Angry at my friends. I got Angry at my parents. I got Angry at my brother. I even got Angry at my pets. I regretted my actions and keep on wondering why I am an Angry person. And because of that, it keeps on reminding me that I was an Angry person. And because of that, some of my friends would rather stay away from me. I am Sad. I am Suffering from the inside and I can't let it go. That is the Ghost of My Present.

The Ghost of My Future is Uncertainty.
Because I am still Suffering from what I did or what I was in the Past. I couldn't be my real self yet. I am still Suffering. It's like there is something I wanted to say, but can't find the person to listen to my plight. There is this Pain that I am feeling that is trying to Burst Out of My Chest. The Pain that I tried to cope with, but I have been asking myself "For How Long More?". Sometimes I felt that Giving Up is the only way, but I can't do it. The Pain is getting Unbearable as days pass. The Suffering will continue. That is the Ghost of My Future.

Suffering

I have been Suffering alone all this years. Firstly no one listens to me. Secondly, everyone expect me to do anything and everything.
Maybe I might looked like I can do lots of things, but sometimes, there are things that I can't do and yet people expect me to do.
I am Sad. I kept everything to myself.
If I speak up, people would think I am trying to argue or even think that I am trying to run away.
I have no rights to talk. Even before I even have the chance to open my mouth.
So, I kept quiet. I do things but kept quiet. I don't talk much. I kept everything inside me.
Sometimes it feels like there is something trying to burst out from my chest, yet I try to keep a straight face. Over the years, everything and anything keep on adding yet I can't let it out. It's is Painful. Suffering for so long, I don't know when there is a chance to even let it all out. Suffering for so many years, I learned to make it part of my Life. So, I might be smilling a Thousand Million Smiles. Yet, I am Suffering inside of myself. It is very painful, yet I learned to cope with it.

One Thousand Million Smile

One Thousand Million Smile is the title for the song that late Sudirman sang.
A Smile to me is worth more than all the gold this world can gather in front of me.
One Thousand Million Smile, One Thousand Million Ways to make people Happy.
But in this harsh Reality. Can one actually be Happy?

Reality is really Cruel most of the Time.
It's like a TV Drama.
When things looks to be going to be like "Happily Ever After", somehow the ending turns out to be tragic. That a TV Drama.
But in Reality, it's almost the same. Some of the Time.
Is this Fate?
Is this God's Will?

One Thousand Million Smile.
One Thousand Million Sadness.
That's the harsh reality of it.

Anger

I was an Angry person before.
I tend to lose my temper at simple things in Life.
I am no longer that person.

Anger leads to Hate?
I didn't Hate anyone because I was Angry at anyone.
I don't Hate people.
But I do Wish people would leave me alone.
But that was the Angry person in me.
I am no longer that person.

From Anger, I understand Suffering.
I was Suffering from within.
But it wasn't Hate.
It was Loneliness.
It was Fear.
It was Confusion and Misunderstanding.

People Hate me more than I Hate them.
But I do not Hate them. I Love them.
They just don't Understand.

Yoda Was Wrong.

Yoda said "Fear Leads to anger , anger leads to hate ,to hate Leads to suffering.."

Fear doesn't lead to Anger.
Fear leads to Confusion, Confusion leads to Misunderstanding, Misunderstanding leads to Hate.

Hate leads to Suffering. Yes, Hate does lead to Suffering.
To Hate someone, you are Suffering from within.

Why do we Suffer when we Hate?
Don't we also Suffer when we Love?
To Love, is to Suffer.
To Hate, is to Suffer.
To Hate or Not to Hate?
To Love or Not to Love?

William Shakespeare wrote in Hamlet: "To Be or Not to Be?"
In Love, it is To Be Love or Not to Be Love.
To Hate, it is To Be Hate or Not to Be Hate.
That's why To Hate is To Suffer.
That's also why To Love is To Suffer.
Yoda was wrong afterall.

Evil

What is Evil?
Are Evil people actually Misundertood people?
Are they born Evil?

Evil.
How do you see an act as Evil?
How do you listen to something that is Evil?
How do you say something that is Evil?

Do you Hear no Evil?
Do you Talk no Evil?
Do you See no Evil?
Can you really do that?

What is Evil?
Evil is in the Eye of the Beholder.
An Evil act to one, might not be an Evil act to someone else.
If that was the case, are Evil people misunderstood?

Nameless

What's in a Name?
People have names because they have some inner meanings to it. The Red Indians in America. Their names reflect their personality. Their name reflect their courage. Their name reflect their ancestor.
But does everyone on earth is like the Red Indians?
What's in a Name?

A name is part of your Soul.
A person that take pride in their own name might be someone that has a Soul.
Might?
Not everyone that has a Name has a Soul.
Evil people have name by they don't have a Soul.
Nameless people have names but the Name are not theirs.
Nameless people also don't have a Soul.
Are they also Evil people?

What is Evil?
Are Evil people, Misunderstood people?
Or are they people born without a Soul?
Are they really Evil?
They have Names, but why they have no Soul?

Souless

Why do I say that I am Souless?
I say that I am Souless because I Hate everyone, yet I Love everyone. However, I also hope that everyone would disappear and leave me Alone.

Why am I Nameless?
I have many Names, yet none of them are my name. I am thus Nameless.
Why I have many Names?
I have many Names because I don't have a Soul.
A Name is part of a person's Soul.
When a person has no Name, a person is thus Souless.

Is a Souless person Heartless?
What is a Soul?

Love

Love is the Greatest Power of All.
Do you believe that?
Is Love really that Powerful?
Can Love be the All Powerful Conqueror of Hate?

Can Hate turn to Love?
Two people can Hate each other, but can they Love each other too?
Two people can Argue with each other, but can they Smile at each other after that?
Two people can Love each other, but can it turn into Hate?
Can Two people Hate each other Forever?
Where Is The Power Of Love when Two people Hate each other?

Is Love really that Powerful?

Hate

Do you Hate yourself?
Do you Love yourself?

What actually is Hate?
Do you Hate because you were bullied?
Do you Hate because you Lose something to someone else?
Do you Hate because you Hate yourself?

What actually is Love?
Do you Love because you see something special in someone else?
Do you Love because you Hate yourself?
Do you Love because you were Liked by everyone else?
Do you Love because someone is there to Love you back?
Do you Love because no one is there to Love you?

What is Hate?
Do you Love to Hate?
Or do you Hate to Love?

Rebirth is Happiness

When there is Rebirth, there will be Happiness.
When there is Death, there will be Sadness.
When there is Life, there will be Suffering and Despair.
When there is Life, there will be Happiness.
When there is Life, there will be Sorrow.
When there is Sorrow, there will be Hatred.

Why do you Hate?
Why do you Love?
Why do you Suffer so much?
Why do you Hate so much?

Do you Hate?

Life After Death

Is there really Life After Death?
Death brings Sorrow and Sadness.
But it also bring a New Beginning.
The cycle of Life doesn't End After Death.
But what really happens After Death?

Can we know what is Beyond The Light at the End of the Tunnel?
Are we allowed to know?

Things tends to happen in a certain way.
No matter how we want to avoid it, it still happens.
That's Fate.
Fate is sometimes also Death.
So, is Death, Fate?
Or Fate is just something that we must face Before Death?

Is Life, Fate?
Is it Fate that make you face Death?
Is your Life Fated?
Will you face Death and say it is Fate?
Or will you try to avoid Fate?

Life After Death.
When there is Death, there will be Life.
When there is Death, there is Rebirth.
Rebirth is Life.
Rebirth is Happiness.

When does it all End?

When does it all End?
Happiness?
Sorrow?
Sadness?
Hatred?
Life?
Death?
Suffering?
Despair?
When does it all End?

At the End of Time?
What's the meaning of Life?
Does one's Life End because another has Begun?
Does Life means Death?
What's the meaning of Death?
Does Death means Sadness or Sorrow or Suffering or Despair?
Are you Despair with your Life?
Are you Suffering in your Life?
Does Sorrow follow you throughout your Life?

When does it all End?
How does it End?
Is the Light really at the End of the Tunnel?
Is there really Life after Death?

Happiness or Sorrow?

When there is Happiness there comes Sorrow.
But when there is Sorrow there is no Happiness.
Is Happiness an Illusion?
Is Happiness a Myth?
When will there be Happiness?

Why Sorrow?
Sadness comes from within.
Does Happiness also comes from within?
Does Sadness brings Suffering?
Does Sorrow brings Suffering?

Why do you Suffer?
Why are you Sad?
When will you be Happy?

Are you Happy?
Are you Sad?
Happiness and Sadness.
When does it all End?

Life & Death

What is Life?
Is your life happy? Sad? sorrow? Suffering? despair?
What is Life?
Is Life something that is worth it's weight in gold?
Is Life fragile?
How important is Life?

Is there Life after Death?
What is Death?
Is Death the end?
Is Death the beginning?
Is Death the beginning of the end?

What is Life?
What is Death?
Does Life has a meaning?
Does Death has a meaning?
What is Life?
What is Death?

The meaning of Life is?
The meaning of Death is?
Is Life something that comes before Death?
Or is Life something that comes after Death?

When there is Life there is Death.
When there is Death there is Sorrow.
When there is Sorrow there is Suffering.
Is there Happiness after Death?
Or there is only Sorrow after Death?
Happiness or Sorrow?

Death & Rebirth

This world has seen Death many times. But is there Rebirth?
What's is the true meaning of Death?
Is it something to run away from?
Is it something we must face day by day?
Death. It is fate. With Death, comes Rebirth.

Rebirth. Is it something that comes after Death?
After Death a new born is born.
Is that Rebirth?
Is that the cycle of Life?
What is Life & Death?

Souless & Nameless

I came into this world a Souless person. I wasn't given a name. I am Nameless. They like to call me "The Nameless One".
Can I live in this beautiful world? Without a name, without a soul. Is it that heartless to be given a soul?
When does one get a soul? At birth? or when something happens to them?

In this life, what's in a name?
A name that has meanings?
A name that doesn't make people laugh at you?
A name that sounds nice and cute?
What's in a name?